InnerHealingMusic.com

Archive for the ‘Drainers (No Plumbing Required)’ Category

I wanted to talk to you about the dangers of spending too much time with certain people, and I do mean dangers. We are all well aware of the fact that we are energized by some people, and drained by others. What we don’t fully realize is just how long it takes for us to recover from these drainers, you know those people who after they’ve gone, leave you feeling like you need a six month nap. We all have people like this in our lives….friends, associates and yes, even family. They grate at you, irritate you, drag you down, get you into a negative cycle, and create conflict and anger in your life. It’s impossible to completely get rid of these people, but you should at any cost avoid interacting with them as much as possible. And if you can, detach yourself from them altogether.

The common routine the drainer uses is the same regardless of their personal story. They usually “drop in” or call unannounced with some “major” dilemma that has just occurred or is occurring in their life, in which you feel compelled to drop everything you’re doing and “help” them out. STOP right there…….understand one thing, you are not “helping” them out,  what you are doing in fact is giving them more of a reason to feel worse about their “problem” by listening and sympathizing. Oh yeah, these “drainers” don’t have any intentions of changing or doing anything to make their “problem” go away, they just want someone to dump on so they can go on feeling like #%6** and your listening gives them that validation.

Do yourself and your loved ones a favor. The next time one of these drainers calls you, visits you or enters (uninvited of course) your zone, here’s what to do. Listen for 30-60 seconds….. period, then give them a resource (person, phone # or organization) that they can get in touch with who could “help” them with their “issue” and turn them loose (I’d love to hear all about it but I’m running terribly late for an appointment.) I guarantee you that this person will rarely if ever contact you again. Remember that they don’t want help with their “problems” they are the problem, and God forbid you should ever get to the point where you think you are actually helping them. Their next, or should I say your next ”major” dilemma is waiting for you just around the corner (along with a thousand others)…I hope you have a  comfortable pillow, you will definitely be spending more time with it than you think.

Until Next Time…Yours in Health and Healing,

Sam

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